"MR. SMITH GOES TO WASHINGTON" Screenplay by Sidney Buchman Story by Lewis R. Foster The CAPITOL DOME at Washington fades in. It is night, and the dome is flooded in light. This view dissolves to the exterior of a Newspaper Office WINDOW, seen at night. The letters on the window, illuminated by a street light, are picked out with increasing distinctness. They read: WASHINGTON POST-DISPATCH. This dissolves into the NIGHT CITY EDITOR'S OFFICE, where a lethargic, eyeshaded man behind a desk reaches for the telephone which is ringing. EDITOR (mechanically) Desk-- (Then, perking up) What? Inside a PHONE BOOTH in a Hospital Corridor, where a nurse seated at the corridor desk is visible through the glass doors of the booth, a man is telephoning: REPORTER Senator Samuel Foley--dead. Died a minute ago--here at St. Vincent's. At the bedside was state political sidekick, Senator Joseph Paine-- And we see the HOSPITAL OFFICE where Senator Joseph Paine, a trim, rather dignified man of fifty-eight, occupying the desk of the nurse who stands by, is talking rapidly and agitatedly into a phone. PAINE (into the phone) Long distance? Senator Joseph Paine speaking. I want the Governor's residence at Jackson City--Governor Hubert Hopper. Hurry-- The scene dissolves into a skimming view of TELEPHONE WIRES strung over a vast distance--and then into the BEDROOM of Governor and Mrs. Hopper, where the Governor and his wife are found in their twin beds, the room darkened. The buzzer is sounding. Mrs. Emma Hopper, wife of the Governor, sits bolt upright in the dark. EMMA (a shrew) I knew it! I knew a night's rest wasn't possible in this house! (As the buzzer is heard again) Hubert! HUBERT (waking with a start, bewildered) Wha--? Yes, sweetheart-- Wha--? EMMA That infernal phone! HUBERT Yes, yes--phone, phone-- (Fumbling for the light) A--an outrage, pet--an outrage--I'll look into this-- (Seizing the phone) Hello--Joe!--What!--No! Not really! Terrible! EMMA What is it? In the HOSPITAL ROOM, we see Paine on the phone. PAINE It couldn't have come at a worse time. Call Jim Taylor. Tell him I'm taking a plane tonight for home. In GOVERNOR HOPPER'S BEDROOM: HUBERT (on the phone) Yes, Joe, yes--right away. (He hangs up--then lifts the receiver again and begins to dial) EMMA What is it? HUBERT Sam Foley--dead! EMMA Great saints! HUBERT Of all the times! Of all the times! Two months to the end of his term-- and Foley has to go and die on us-- EMMA Whom are you calling--in the dead of night? HUBERT Taylor, my dear. EMMA Can't that wait, Hubert? HUBERT No, no--believe me, pet--this is *most* urgent-- (Into the phone) Hello, hello. Is Taylor there?-- Governor Hopper. Quickly, please-- EMMA This isn't a home, it's the crossroads of the world! HUBERT Now, now, Emma, dear--you mustn't forget we have been chosen by the people of this commonwealth to-- EMMA (sharply) Save that for the laying of cornerstones, Hubert! (Groaning) Oh, that morning you looked in the mirror and saw a statesman! HUBERT Now, pet-- (Then, excitedly into the phone) Jim! In political boss TAYLOR'S ROOM, we see JIM TAYLOR, a hard- bitten, taciturn, impressive man in his fifties. At the moment, he stands at a phone, in vest and rolled up sleeves, a cigar between his fingers. Behind him, in a smoke-filled room, man are seated at a card table from which Taylor evidently has just risen. TAYLOR What's up, Happy? In HOPPER'S BEDROOM: HUBERT Sam Foley--died tonight in Washington. Joe just called. Can you imagine anything more--? In TAYLOR'S ROOM: TAYLOR Died, huh? Well, take it easy, Happy. Is Paine coming?--Good. Keep your shirt on--and your mouth shut. No statements. In HOPPER'S BEDROOM: HUBERT (into the phone) Y-yes, Jim--Yes-- And now flashing on the screen are NEWSPAPER HEADLINES of the following morning--announcing Foley's death--and finally such headlines as: SUCCESSOR TO FOLEY TO BE NAMED BY GOVERNOR APPOINTEE WILL FILL OUT UNEXPIRED TERM OF TWO MONTHS HOPPER'S CHOICE FOR VACANT SENATE CHAIR EAGERLY AWAITED The scene dissolves into the GOVERNOR'S OUTER OFFICE, in the morning. The office is full of people--newspapermen--dignified citizens--women--all waiting to see the Governor. A group is collected around the male secretary's desk. Two other desks are seen with secretaries at them. There is an undertone of talk. REPORTER If His Excellency's statement is going to make the noon edition-- SECRETARY Governor Hopper said you would have it any minute-- An austere gent named Edwards pushes toward the desk. EDWARDS (firmly) Will you please remind the Governor again-- SECRETARY He know your committee is waiting, Mr. Edwards. (Raising his voice over the room) The Governor will see *all* committees at the first opportunity. In the GOVERNOR'S PRIVATE OFFICE we see Hubert Hopper and McGann, the former on the dictagraph, while McGann lounges in a chair. HUBERT (into the dictagraph) Yes, yes--tell them I'll see them immediately--immediately! (Snapping up the dictagraph, turning wildly on McGann) I can't hold them off! They want something to say about this appointment. Ten to one they've got a man. MCGANN Relax, Happy. Jim said to wait. HUBERT I *can't* wait, McGann! You go into that room and tell Jim Taylor and Joe Paine that I give them *one more minute*-- MCGANN (quietly) *You* tell Jim Taylor. HUBERT (walking--fuming) Washington! Always discussing the problems of Washington. Nobody ever thinks of the State--and my problems! (With sudden determination) I *will* tell Jim Taylor. It's high *time* I told him a thing or two! (He pushes the door to a small ante room) In the ANTE-ROOM, Joe Paine and Jim Taylor are on their feet, as Happy insert his head. HUBERT (angrily) Look here, Jim--if you and Joe are going to gab about this appointment *any* longer, I'm going ahead and see those committees! TAYLOR (sharply) You'll see those committees when we're finished! HUBERT (meekly) Yes, Jim. Hubert retires, closing the door. Jim Taylor turns back to Paine. TAYLOR That Happy Hopper is tougher to handle than a prima-donna. PAINE --in other words, Jim--with this Willet Creek Dam on the fire--the man who goes to the Senate now in Sam Foley's place can't ask any questions or talk out of turn. We must be absolutely sure of him. TAYLOR That's why I say Miller--Horace Miller. He jumped through hoops for the machine before we moved him up to the bench. He'll take orders. PAINE Jim--suppose we didn't try to go through with this Willet Creek Dam-- suppose we postpone it until the next session of Congress--or drop it altogether-- TAYLOR That'd be a crime--after all this work--getting it buried in this Deficiency Bill as nice as you please-- approved--all ready to roll-- PAINE How much does the Willet Dam mean to you, Jim? TAYLOR Joe--I've got a lot of people to take care of in this State. PAINE I know, but is it worth the risk of a scandal now that a new man is going to the Senate? TAYLOR Joe--what's the matter with you-- where you're concerned, I wouldn't take the slightest risk--'specially now after the great reputation you've made in the Senate. Why, look at this campaign I've started for you in all my papers. You're the logical man from the West on the National ticket--at the convention, anything can happen-- There is a pause while Joe looks at a newspaper. TAYLOR Joe, that's coming a long way in twenty years since I met you practising law down there in Main Street. PAINE Jim--if what you say about the future is remotely possible--why not do as I say--drop things like this dam? TAYLOR We can't drop it now, Joe. We bought the land around this Dam and we're holding it in dummy names. If we drop it or delay it--we are going to bring about investigations, and investigations will show that we own that land and are trying to sell it to the State under phoney names. No, Joe, in my judgment the only thing to do is push this Dam through--and get it over with. PAINE Well, then appoint Miller--if you're sure he'll take orders. TAYLOR Don't worry about Horace--he'll take orders. Come on-- He goes to the door quickly, followed by Paine. In the GOVERNOR'S PRIVATE OFFICE, as Taylor and Paine barge in, Happy Hubert throws his hands up. HUBERT Well! Thank Heaven! The dictagraph buzzes. HUBERT (shouting into it) One minute! Just one minute! TAYLOR Happy, we've got the man. Horace Miller! HUBERT Horace Mill--! MCGANN (leaping up) Terrific! A born stooge! Horace'll perform like a trained seal. HUBERT Jim--if I fling a party man like Horace in the face of those angry committees-- TAYLOR Happy, for reasons there isn't time to go into--it's got to be Miller! We've given you the man. Now write the ticket. (Moving to the door) Come on, Joe. Come on, Chick. HUBERT (following them) Now, wait fellows--great Heavens. I've got to see those angry committees first--feel them out a little--work for harmony--harmony. MCGANN Harmony--and Horace Miller. The scene dissolves to the GOVERNOR'S OFFICE, full of committee people, arranged in rows of chairs, closely packed together. Hubert, at his desk, is addressing them. HUBERT (spreading the old oil) Gentlemen--in considering the candidates who might answer to the high qualifications of United States Senator--there was one name that shone out like a beacon--one I'm sure you will enthusiastically approve-- the Honorable *Horace Miller*. A minor bedlam breaks loose. Excited men rise and shout. VOICES Miller! Not Horace Miller! A Taylor Man! The Veterans will have no part of him! A party man! One of Taylor's tools! Give us a clean man for a change! The New Citizen's Committee won't stand for Miller! HUBERT (smiling sickly, wincing) --please-- The scene dissolves to the GOVERNOR'S LIBRARY in the HOPPER HOME, at night. Hubert stands troubledly while Taylor, hat in hand, is tearing into him and McGann just listens. TAYLOR They put up *their* candidate? Who? HUBERT (swallowing) Henry Hill. TAYLOR *Henry Hill?* That crackpot? That long-haired--! Why, you should have killed that so fast--! HUBERT I--I couldn't, Jim. Those men were-- TAYLOR We can't help *what* they were! Forget 'em! HUBERT Jim, that bunch is out for blood. If I throw Horace in their teeth now-- TAYLOR I said forget 'em! Horace Miller goes to the Senate--and that settles it! HUBERT I *won't* send Horace Miller! TAYLOR *You won't?* HUBERT I *won't* let you stand there callously and perhaps wreck my whole political future! TAYLOR *Your* political future! I bought it for you and made you a present. And I can grab it back so fast it'll make your head spin. You got a nerve to stand there and worry about just *your future* when we're in this spot! (Starting for the door) The man is--*Miller*. MCGANN (following Taylor; adds dryly) M-i-double l-e-r. The two are gone, leaving Happy very unhappy. He stands for a baleful instant. The butler appears. BUTLER Mr. Edwards of the Citizen's Committee on the phone, sir. HUBERT (groaning) No! I'm out. I'm sick. I--I-- (Collapsing) I'll talk. He picks up the phone. HUBERT (brightening his manner) *Good* evening, Mr. Edwards... Why, I have the matter under advisement this very moment. Now it isn't a question of my *objecting* to Henry Hill-- BY A PHONE, Edwards is seen to be in considerable heat. EDWARDS (into the phone) Hill is the man every decent element wants--and *expects!* It's Henry Hill, Mr. Governor--or else! In the GOVERNOR'S LIBRARY, Hubert is seen wincing. HUBERT (swallowing) Yes, Mr. Edwards. Certainly. I shall bear that in mind. Good night. He hangs up, a picture of deepening misery, as Emma appears at the door. EMMA Dinner, Hubert. HUBERT (absently) I'll bear that in mind... What? Oh. Dinner. Pet--my stomach couldn't hold a bird seed. EMMA (leaving) We're waiting, Hubert. The scene dissolves to the DINING ROOM. The Hopper family is seated at dinner. Six children are around the table--four boys ranging from nine to sixteen, and a couple of in-between girls. The butler is placing the soup before them. HUBERT Really, my dear--I don't feel like a thing. EMMA (over-riding him) Nonsense. PETER ("Number Two" son) What's the matter, Dad? Is it getting you down? HUBERT Is *what* getting me down? JIMMIE ("Number One" son) You're in a deuce of a pickle, aren't you, Pop? OTIS ("Number Three" son) Looks like Henry Hill--huh, Pop? PETER Naw--it's Horace Miller--or else! Hubert chokes on his soup. JIMMIE Gee, I wouldn't appoint an old twerp like Horace Miller--Taylor or no Taylor! HUBERT Taylor! May I ask what *Taylor* has to do with it? JIMMIE Well, he's still running the show, ain't he, Dad? HUBERT Emma! I will not have conversations of this sort carried on by the children at dinner! EMMA Nonsense. Why don't you listen to your children for a change? You might actually learn something? HUBERT (with sarcasm) For instance, how to run the affairs of government? No doubt my children could make this appointment *for* me-- with the greatest ease! JIMMIE That's easy. Jefferson Smith. HUBERT I beg your pardon? PETER Jeff Smith. He's the only Senator to have. OTIS Sure. He ought to be President. LITTLE JACKIE ("Number Four" son) I like Jeff Smith. HUBERT You, too! Fine. Fine. That's everybody heard from. Forgive my abysmal ignorance--but I don't know Jefferson Smith from a-- PETER Gosh, Pop--head of the Boy Rangers! HUBERT Oh, a *boy*! JIMMY No, *no*, Pop--Jeff's a *man*! Jeff Smith! Biggest expert we got on wild game--and animals--and rocks. PETER Yes, and right now he's the greatest hero we ever had. It's all over the headlines-- JIMMY Sure. Didn't you see about the terrific forest fire all around Sweetwater? HUBERT I did. What about it? PETER Well, Jeff put that out himself. HUBERT Himself! JIMMIE Well--Jeff and the Rangers. He was out camping with 'em--and they saved hundreds of people and millions of dollars-- OTIS And not one boy even scratched! JIMMIE Now, if you really want a Senator-- HUBERT I do *not* want a Senator. And I do *not* want any more of this nonsense! Emma! EMMA Why, I think it's very sweet of the children-- OTIS He's the greatest *American* we got, too, Dad. Can tell what George Washington said--by heart. An' "Boy Stuff's" got the swellest stuff in it. HUBERT What stuff? PETER "Boy Stuff." That's the name of Jeff's magazine. He prints it. (Pulling one out of his pocket excitedly) Look--here's one--oh, it's great-- *everybody* reads it--all the kids in the State--a million of 'em. Look, Pop--let me read you a-- HUBERT Peter, I'm in no mood to hear childish prattle! JIMMY Prattle! PETER You're all wet, Pop! Listen to this: (Flipping back to a page) "What makes a man humane to man--to give and not to take--to serve and not to rule--ideals and not deals-- creed and not greed--." How about *that*? OTIS No, *sir*! You couldn't do better, Dad. HUBERT Than what? OTIS Jeff for Senator. HUBERT (his anger rising) Emma! Will you *please*--? PETER (leaping in on the attack) Want to get out of a pickle, don't you? OTIS (leaping right in, too) Always looking out for votes, aren't you? PETER Yeah--an' here's fifty thousand kids with two folks apiece--and *they vote*! JIMMIE (attacking too) If you want to do yourself some good in this State, Dad-- OTIS If you're ever going to stand up like a man some day and tell Taylor to go to-- EMMA Otis! HUBERT (rising frantically) That settles it! I will not be attacked and belittled by my own children in my own home! My nerves are strained to the breaking point! He throws his serviette down and rushes from the dining-room. EMMA Hubert! LITTLE JANE Papa's mad, Mama. The scene dissolves to Hubert Hopper's STUDY, at night. Hubert is pacing miserably as Emma enters, carrying his dinner on a plate and setting it down on his desk. HUBERT (in quiet, heart- breaking appeal) Emma! I'm a man at the end of his rope. EMMA No wonder--without your dinner. HUBERT Emma, which is it--Horace Miller or Henry Hill? EMMA (starting out) Well, your children are very bright-- and *they* say Jefferson Smith. And Emma, without pausing, passes on out. Hubert is beside himself, and begins to pace again. HUBERT (to himself, distractedly) Henry Hill--Horace Miller--Henry Miller--Horace Hi--uh--Henry-- Then on a desperate impulse, he takes a coin from his pocket and gets ready to flip. HUBERT Heads--Hill. Tails--Miller. He shuts his eyes and flips. The coin falls on the library table. He rushes to it. His eyes pop. The COIN is seen standing on edge, leaned against a small stack of magazines and papers. HUBERT is at his wit's end. Then his eyes travel over to the paper on top of the pile. We see the NEWSPAPER HEADLINE: GRATEFUL CITIZENS POUR GRATITUDE ON HERO JEFF SMITH Hubert stares at this headline, then suddenly, wildly, dashes for the door. The scene dissolves to a STREET, at night: a row of simple, white-frame houses with neatly kept front years and white picket fences. Street lamps illumine the scene. A limousine has come to a stop before one HOUSE, JEFFERSON SMITH'S, and Governor Hubert Hopper is alighting. He pauses to look at the house, is uncertain for an instant as to whether to go in or not; then makes up his mind, pushes through the gate and goes up the walk. At the DOOR, Hubert pauses again before knocking, but finally does so. As his knuckles rap on the door, a terrific blast of band music, blaring instruments badly played. lets go from inside the house. Hubert, startled out of his wits, turns to run for his life and makes two steps when the door is opened; and there stands a smallish, somewhat gray, sweet- faced little lady (Jeff's Ma). The music goes on, so that both have to raise their voices above it. MA I *thought* I heard... Yes? HUBERT Uh--Jefferson Smith's residence? MA Yes. Come in. HUBERT Is--uh--Jefferson Smith at home? MA Certainly. Step right in. In the SITTING ROOM of the Smith Home, a neat, cozy room, there are about twenty kids, ranging from nine to fifteen, imitating a band. An older boy is leading them. They are of all descriptions of dress; some in poor clothes--one with his leg in a brace. Hubert edges into the room dumbfounded. MA (loudly above the music) I'll call Jeff. He's back in the shop-- She starts across the room. Hubert remains, disconcerted by the music. Suddenly, he looks off into the adjoining room with curious interest--and also to escape the music, he moves toward it. The adjoining room the Hubert enters is an OFFICE. It contains everything from a roll-top desk crammed with mail, to a small power printing press--to short-wave radio equipment. It is a beehive of activity, with some eight or ten boys working like the seven dwarfs--printing cards on the press--tying copies of "Boy Stuff" into bundles--tinkering with the short- wave set. Hubert is set back on his heels by this unexpected sight. He notes the little placards framed on the wall, bearing the words of great men, and such admonitions as: "When there's an edge--give it to the other fellow." "When a man dies he clutches in his hands only that which he has given away during his lifetime--" --Jean Jacques Rousseau. "No man is good enough to govern another."--Abraham Lincoln. "You've got to do your own growing, no matter how tall your grandfather was." He notes the boys working at the radio-- others working at the desk--while all the time, the little power press goes on. Suddenly Ma returns, followed by Jefferson Smith--fine looking, rangy, youthful--at the moment wiping some white substance from his right hand. JEFFERSON Good evening, sir. I was just making some-- (Then, astoundedly) Governor Hopper! MA Well--I'll go to Halifax! Suddenly great excitement ensues. JEFFERSON Boys! Attention! Governor Hopper! The little fellows drop what they are doing and come to attention while Jeff dives for a chair and whips it around. HUBERT Now--now--please--that's quite all right. Relax, boys-- JEFFERSON (at attention) This--this is a great honor, sir. I-- I-- HUBERT Not at all. I've come to pay you a personal and official--and I might say--a *tardy* tribute, Mr. Smith, for your recent heroic conduct. JEFFERSON Oh, now, I'm afraid that's been exaggerated some-- HUBERT No. No. A signal service to the State. Yes, indeed. And not only that but-- uh--I've heard of your excellent work in leading and guiding our youth-- JEFFERSON Well--that's not work, sir--that's fun. HUBERT No doubt. No doubt. And this fine little paper--"Boy Stuff"--with, I dare say, an *enormous* circulation in the State. MA Well--it started with a little mimeograph sheet--and it's just grown out of all sense and reason-- HUBERT Excellent! Excellent! My boy, I'm convinced our State has a great debt of gratitude to you-- JEFFERSON Oh, now-- MA Jefferson-- JEFFERSON Yes, Ma? MA Excuse me for interrupting, Governor, but-- (To Jeff) --that plaster's gonna harden any second, son. JEFFERSON (on edge) Gosh! You see sir--I was fixing some plaster for a cast on Amos' leg-- he's always chewing 'em off. I'll only be a minute--if you'll excuse me, sir-- HUBERT By all means--by all means. Jeff exits hurriedly. MA Maybe you'd like to come along and watch, Governor? Jefferson's done a wonderful job with that leg. HUBERT Why, of course. Ma starts out after Jeff--Hubert follows. He descends the few steps after her. The PET SHOP, which Ma and Hubert enter, is a crudely built room, another addition to the house proper. The instant they set foot inside, the damnedest furore breaks loose--dogs bark--parrots scream, until Hubert is about to lose his mind. Jeff is placing his plaster on the center table and is stepping to one of the cages. JEFFERSON (calling) Jerry! Blackie! Queenie! Let's have it quiet, fellows! MA (calling) Now, now, now! (To Hubert) It's all right, Governor. She moves toward the table--Hubert following. HUBERT A pet shop? MA Well, it sort of got to be--from Jeff just pullin' splinters and things-- Jeff pulls down from a cage Amos, a Siamese monkey, and sets him on the TABLE. Amos is fighting fiercely. The cast on his leg hangs down in shreds. Hubert, approaching, is amazed and startled. Jefferson starts to pull the old cast from Amos' leg. JEFFERSON (to Ma) Here, Skinny, give me a hand. Hold Amos' tail down so he can't get it around my waist. Ma holds the monkey's tail as directed--or tries to. JEFFERSON (to Amos) Now, now, now--that isn't going to get you any place. Get a firm grip, Ma! MA Satan's in this little fella tonight! JEFFERSON (at work) Sorry about this, Governor. But it won't take a minute. You were saying something in the other room, sir-- HUBERT Well--yes--I was saying--the State should reward you-- JEFFERSON Aw-- HUBERT --And it is in my power to confer a very signal honor upon you. In my official capacity, therefore, I-- JEFFERSON Ma! Hold him! MA I just can't, son--not the head and tail both! HUBERT Uh--could--could I help--? JEFFERSON Thanks, Governor--*yes*! Do you mind? His head--Ma'll take the tail. HUBERT The--head? JEFFERSON Just get one hand against each ear there--keep his face straight up. Hubert timidly does as directed. Amos yells--Hubert almost lets go. JEFFERSON Amos! (To Governor) Hold 'im, Governor. That's right. Cinch him down. Fine--fine-- Jeff starts to put the plaster on. JEFFERSON What were you saying, Governor? Sorry. HUBERT (determinedly--once and for all) I said, sir--in my official capacity-- as an honorary gesture--I appoint you to the United States Senate! It does not penetrate to Jeff that instant. JEFFERSON Now, Amos, now-- (Then, as Hubert's words hit) What? MA What? At this instant, Amos wriggles his head and sinks his teeth into the soft, white thumb of Governor Hopper. HUBERT (yelling) Ow! He bit me! He lets go of Amos, who wriggles and is nearly off the table. Jeff and Ma make a dive for him. JEFFERSON (yelling) Amos! Amos! And, added to everything else, the pet shop goes up in a roar. The scene dissolves to NEWSPAPER HEADLINES, a flaring, eight- column head reads: GOVERNOR HOPPER IN SURPRISE APPOINTMENT And another headline (with picture of Jefferson Smith): HERO JEFFERSON SMITH IS GOVERNOR'S SENATE CHOICE The scene dissolves to the GOVERNOR'S LIBRARY, in the morning. Taylor, McGann, Hubert and Paine are present. TAYLOR (pounding a newspaper in his hand, yelling at Happy) --a *boy ranger* a squirrel chaser-- to the United States Senate! HUBERT Jim--the answer to a prayer--manna from heaven--the man *we want*--and the votes *we need*-- MCGANN He's batty! HUBERT Listen--the simpleton of all time--a big-eyed patriot--knows Washington and Lincoln by heart--stood at attention in the Governor's presence-- collects stray boys and cats-- TAYLOR What! HUBERT Joe--*you* know what I'm talking about. The perfect man. Never in politics in his life. Wouldn't find out what it's all about in two *years*, lets alone two months. But the important thing--and this was the genius of the stroke--*it means votes*! MCGANN Oh--oh. HUBERT He's the hero of fifty thousand boys and a hundred thousand parents. Look at these congratulations pouring in! I tell you, gentlemen, by this one statesman-like act, I have-- TAYLOR (deadly) But you went ahead and made this appointment without asking me-- HUBERT Jim--when the lightning hit, I--I just-- TAYLOR *But you never asked me*! HUBERT (petulantly) Oh--Jim! PAINE Wait a minute, boys. Happy may have hit on something tremendous here. Rather than let Miller or anyone else in at this stage, we simply put blinders on this simple son of nature-- and turn him loose on monuments. He's completely out of the way in Washington, and as Happy says, you make political capital out of it at home. TAYLOR Joe--do you mean to say--do you think you can actually *handle* this--this whatever-you-call-it in Washington? PAINE (quietly) A young patriot?--Who recites Jefferson and Lincoln?--turned loose in our nation's capital? I think I can. TAYLOR (after a pause) Chick--turn the ballyhoo boys loose on this right away. Greatest appointment ever made. A banquet-- declare a holiday. MCGANN Wow! A star-spangled banquet--and one of Happy's windy spiels--music-- little kids--the flag--a tear-jerker from way back--! The scene dissolves to a MONTAGE, a series of headlines screaming approval of Happy's choice--pictures of Happy with Smith--of Happy shaking hands with person after person in his office--of Jeff Smith surrounded by boys in his home, cheering him, clustered around--and adults shaking his hand-- of telegrams coming to him in stacks--of, finally at night, the Boy's Club band in the street, marching to a martial air, banners at their head reading: "OUR OWN SENATOR JEFFERSON SMITH." This dissolves to a BANQUET HALL, in which HOPPER, seen at close range, in white tie--beaming--on his feet at the banquet table--is addressing an assemblage. HUBERT --in the hands of your Governor lay the power to confer a great honor-- to raise a man to the high office of United States Senator. And how did your Governor confer that honor? The scene then reveals a great, horseshoe banquet table, crowded with leading citizens. At Hubert's left and right sit Jefferson and Ma, Mrs. Hopper and Paine. MA is seen beaming, while JEFFERSON looks dazed and nervous. HUBERT'S VOICE Did he give it to some wealthy or influential citizen merely to curry favor? No! (As Paine is seen looking down at Jeff) Did he give it to some unworthy political hireling? No! TAYLOR AND MCGANN are seen seated at one of the wing tables-- to be out of sight. McGann raised his eyes to heaven for relief. HUBERT'S VOICE What *did* he do? True to our party's tradition-- EDWARDS is seen listening skeptically. HUBERT'S VOICE --he went down among the people-- (warming to a climax, the banquet now in full view) --and there found--a nugget! A hero!! That was the spirit your Governor acted in. And in that spirit we have come together tonight to acclaim and bid Godspeed to--Senator Jefferson Smith. Strong applause--people get to their feet--a band blares a salute. Hubert motions Jeff to get to his feet. Dry-mouthed, Jeff rises. The noise dies out. They wait. JEFFERSON (simply--slowly) Well--uh--thank you. I--I sort of have a feeling there's been a big mistake--I mean-- (as gentle laughter greets him) --I--I can't think of a greater honor. It isn't just mine. It belongs to all my boys. (Turning to Paine) Sitting with a man like Senator Paine-- I can't tell you how much greater that makes the honor. He and my father were very dear friends. PAINE, startled, is seen looking up at Jeff. JEFFERSON'S VOICE My father used to tell me that Joseph Paine was the finest man he ever knew. The applause startles Paine. He looks down, two places removed, to MA, who is leaning over, smiling at him. Her mouth forms the words: "Hello, Joseph." We again see the banquet hall in full view, as the applause stops. JEFFERSON I don't think I'll be much help to you, Senator Paine. (Laughter from the audience) But I *can* promise you this--I'll uphold the honor with all my might-- I'll do nothing to disgrace the name of--Senator of the United States. (He sits down amid a storm of applause) TAYLOR AND MCGANN are seen applauding mechanically. MCGANN Who'd ever think I'd be back in Sunday School? The applause continues in the banquet hall. Then, suddenly, a band starts to play off scene. All heads turn to the rear of the hall. The BIG DOORS are pushed open and the Boy's Club Band--followed by more of Jeff's boys--comes marching in. The boys range in size from tiny fellows in front-- building back up, row by row, to the larger fellows in rear. They march into the middle of the table formation. The band plays a march. The banqueters cheer. JEFFERSON'S eyes are alight. The boys come to a stop, marking time, until the band stops. A little fellow--Jackie Hopper--steps to the front. He is carrying something wrapped up. HUBERT AND EMMA are seen watching this. EMMA (proudly) Jackie! TAYLOR AND MCGANN are also watching. MCGANN So help me--it's Snow White and a thousand dwarfs! There is a silence in the hall as Jackie wets his lips and addresses Jeff. JACKIE (stumbling and nervous with a memorized speech) Senator Jefferson Smith--we are very proud on this great occas--the Boy Rangers take this oppor--uh-- (lifts the package) --in token of their--uh--in token of this-- (breaking off, ad libbing) --It's a briefcase, Jeff! All the kids pitched in! It's for to carry your laws when you get there! He rushes forward and pushes the gift into Jeff's hands. The banqueters then applaud vigorously. Jeff, speechless and touched, stands holding the briefcase. The band strikes up "Auld Lang Syne." Everyone stands up, and joins the song. Paine moves from his place over to Ma. Ma is seen singing--as Paine comes to her side. She stops singing. They shake hands warmly. Then Paine, looking at Jeff, pantomimes: "Is that the little shaver I knew when he was this high?" Ma nods. She starts to sign again, and we get another full view of the hall. The song is sung earnestly by the boys, the banqueters joining it. JEFFERSON has opened the BRIEFCASE and is staring at it. It is seen to be inscribed: SENATOR JEFFERSON SMITH OUR BEST RANGER--OUR BEST PAL JEFF is looking off at the boys--his eyes a little dim; this is the most wonderful moment of his life. This dissolves to a Washington-bound TRAIN, on which we see Jefferson and Senator Paine. Jefferson is fishing out of his briefcase a copy of "Boy Stuff." JEFFERSON Well, it isn't much, but if you insist, here's this week's. (He hands it over) PAINE (examining it) "Boy Stuff." Why, printer's ink runs in your veins, Jeff. You're just like your father. JEFFERSON Thank you, sir. PAINE Even to the hat. Same old dreamer, too. One look at you and I can see him, back of his old roll top desk, hat and all, getting out his paper. Always kept his hat on his head so as to be ready to do battle. Clayton Smith, editor and publisher, and champion of lost causes. JEFFERSON Yeah, Dad always used to say the only causes worth fighting for were lost causes. PAINE You don't have to tell me Jeff. We were a team, the two of us, a struggling editor and a struggling lawyer. The twin champions of lost causes, they used to call us. JEFFERSON Ma's told me about it a thousand times. PAINE His last fight was his best, Jeff. He and his little four-page paper against that mining syndicate and all to defend the right of one small miner who stuck to his claim. You know, they tried everything, bribery, intimidation, then--well-- JEFFERSON Yes, Ma found him slumped over his desk that morning... PAINE Shot in the back. I was there. I can see him at that old roll top desk, still with his hat on... still with his hat on... JEFFERSON I know. I suppose, Mr. Paine, when a fellow bucks up against a big organization like that, one man by himself can't get very far, can he? PAINE No. The scene fades out. In the TRAIN SHED (Washington D.C.), we see McGann, Paine, Jefferson, Porters and bags. JEFFERSON Washington! MCGANN Yeah, for the fifth time, Senator-- Washington. JEFFERSON My pigeons--I better see about my pigeons. MCGANN The porter's got them. They're coming. JEFFERSON (running out) Just a minute, I better make sure. MCGANN (to Paine) Boy! My head's like a balloon--for two whole days. I never knew there was so much American history. PAINE (kidding) You can't find it in racing forms, Chick. MCGANN Fine thing Jim Taylor wished on me-- show him the monuments--I need this job like I need ten pounds. Jeff comes back carrying the pigeons. JEFFERSON Here they are--I got them. They are all right. MCGANN Well, that ends that crisis. This way, Senator. They exit. At the STATION: Jeff, McGann, Paine and Porters walk in. Susan Paine and three other girls rush in and kiss Paine and Jeff. The girls carry little cans or boxes with milk fund ribbons on them--in which they collect money. GIRLS Hello, Father. I saw him first. He's mine--- Jeff is utterly confused by the four girls trying to kiss him. PAINE Here, here, Susan--this is Jeff Smith-- our new Senator. SUSAN I don't care to meet anybody until I get paid--come on--come on. One dollar each, please, for the Milk Fund. ANOTHER GIRL If you don't pay quickly you'll get kissed again. JEFFERSON (confused and searching in his pockets) A dollar--four dollars. Gosh! You wouldn't settle for some keys, would you? PAINE Here, Jeff, I'll advance it for you.-- Fine introduction to the nation's capital! MCGANN (pulling out a roll) Here, I'll take a dozen of those things. Miss Paine. SUSAN (taking money) Thank you, Mister McGann, you have a very kind heart. McGann "burns" at not being kissed. PAINE This is my daughter, Susan, and her friends--Senator Jefferson Smith. GIRLS How do you do? Meet the new Senator. I thought he'd be a Ranger with a big hat. SUSAN (pointing at the pigeons) What have you got there, Senator? MCGANN Pigeons--to carry messages back to Ma. JEFFERSON Just for the fun of it.--You see the one that makes it back home in the fastest time, I am going to enter in the nationals. SUSAN Wonderful! ANOTHER GIRL There's romance in him. SUSAN Imagine having love notes delivered to you by a pigeon. At this instant two middle-aged men, slightly hard-faced, named Cook and Griffith, descend on the party. COOK Joe! GRIFFITH Hello, Chick. MCGANN H'ya, Carl--h'ya, Bill! PAINE Jeff--meet Mr. Cook and Mr. Griffith-- members of our State headquarters here. Cook and Griffiths fall on Jeff, wringing his hand and again Jeff can't get a word in. He has put his pigeons down. COOK Great pleasure, Senator! Yes *sir*. Great appointment! You'll do the old State proud! GRIFFITH Welcome, Senator. This wild life around here is a little different from what you're used to. They wear high heels! Hah! Hah! PAINE Well, let's get started. Bill--you've made reservations at the hotel for the Senator and Chick-- COOK All fixed. Same floor with you, Joe. SUSAN (with lifted eyebrows) How nice. PAINE All right, we'll take Jeff with us-- SUSAN I'm afraid we won't have room in the car, Father. Senator Smith can follow with Mr. McGann and the pigeons. JEFFERSON Sure. SUSAN Well, we *must* see a lot of you, Senator. Come, Father. Paine is being pulled away by Susan. The girls, waving good- bye to Jeff, follow. Griffith walks along a bit with Paine. PAINE (calling back-- cautioning) Chick-- MCGANN I've got 'im, Joe. Be right along. PAINE AND GRIFFITH are now seen together. PAINE Are you ready for him, Bill? GRIFFITH All set. Foley's rooms in the Senate office building--nice, big clean desk--lot of Senator stationery to write his little boys on--and Foley's secretary, Saunders, to make it look like the real thing-- PAINE Good. Are the newspaper men at the hotel? GRIFFITH Yup--Sweeney, Flood, Farrell--waiting for you-- PAINE Fine. The first thing to do is-- present Mr. Smith to the press--in the *right* way. Hurry him along, Bill. GRIFFITH How do you feel, champ? PAINE All right, why? GRIFFITH Your name's spreading like wild-fire out here--you are the winterbook favorite to get on the National ticket. PAINE Oh! Go away. Newsmen come up with cameras to photograph Paine. JEFFERSON, MCGANN AND COOK are seen together. MCGANN All right, Senator--let's get these bags and the livestock together-- JEFFERSON (suddenly pointing) Look! There it is! MCGANN What? Who? We see what Jeff is pointing at--the CAPITOL DOME, up on "The Hill"--framed in one of the station portals. JEFFERSON'S VOICE The Capitol Dome! The GROUP looks at Jeff dryly. COOK Yes, sir--big as life. Been there some time now. MCGANN Yes, sir. (Busily, to porters) All right, boys--let's go. Jeff has taken a few steps in the direction of the Dome. Griffith joins them, and McGann, Cook and Griffith start off with porters. MCGANN This way, Senator. McGann, Cook and Griffith are seen moving on, not conscious that Jeff isn't following. GRIFFITH Say, we thought--maybe we ought to meet him in short pants--you know-- with hatchets. Cook points to the pigeons a porter carriers. COOK What's he bringing pigeons for? MCGANN (sour and sore) What for? Why, suppose there's a storm--all lines are down--how you gonna get a message to Ma? Cook and Griffith give McGann alarmed looks. JEFF is seen, with his eyes fixed ahead, through the portals, on the Dome; he is drawn unconsciously in that directions. MCGANN, COOK AND GRIFFITH are approaching the door to the outside. MCGANN (looks back) Okay, Senator--right through here-- They all stop dead. MCGANN Where is he? Hey, Senator! What's the matter with that cookie? I *told* him to--. Come on, let's find him. Hey, Smith! The three start back into the station. The scene dissolves to the STATION, where McGann, Cook and Griffith are coming together. COOK Positively not in the station! Gone! MCGANN I'll brain that guy! Well--call Paine-- call Saunders-- Carl rushes off. MCGANN (yelling through cupped hands) Hey--*ranger*! The scene dissolves to a PHONE BOOTH, in which Carl Cook is telephoning. COOK --Saunders! Smith hasn't showed up at his office there, has he?... No?... What do you mean 'the slip'?... What's so funny? In JEFF SMITH'S OUTER OFFICE (SENATE OFFICE BUILDING) SAUNDERS is on the phone. She is a girl in her late twenties--pretty-- and a shrewd, keen, abrupt creature--who, at the moment laughs mirthlessly. SAUNDERS Nothing. Have you tried a butterfly net? In the PHONE BOOTH: CARL Lay off, Saunders. If your feet felt like mine... Listen--if he shows up there--Paine's waiting at the hotel with newspaper men--let him know right away--understand? In JEFF'S OUTER OFFICE, Saunders, on the phone, is regarding Diz Moore--a fairly young, disheveled, freckle-faced Irishman, at the moment stretched out on the sofa. SAUNDERS Sure. Sure. I'll hang a light in the steeple. One if by land--two if by sea!... Okay! (Hanging up) Diz--you won't believe it. Daniel Boone's *lost*! DIZ No! The door bursts open and a reporter called Nosey sticks his head in. NOSEY (a fast talker) Is this new guy Smith here yet? I want a little interview. How about it? Arrived yet--? SAUNDERS AND DIZ (together) No! Scram! Blow! Nosey slams out. SAUNDERS How do you *like* this! You don't suppose that ranger met up with some kids--and took 'em for a hike! DIZ That--or he's out blazing trails. He'll show up. SAUNDERS Sure--sure. He must have a compass with him. The scene dissolves to the STATION, where McGann, Cook and Griffith are very tired men. MCGANN (mopping his brow) --that dummy wandered off and got hit by a taxi! Bill--call the hospitals--hurry up--! Bill runs off, McGann yelling after him. MCGANN And while you're at it, get me a bed! COOK Let's send out a pigeon! MCGANN Blow a bugle! The exterior of the CAPITOL BUILDING is seen, in the view from the Library of Congress side, showing both wings of House and Senate with the steps leading up to the massive columns. SPIELER'S VOICE --and there you have it, folks--the Capitol of the United States--the home of Congress-- IN FRONT OF THE CAPITOL, people in a bus are craning their necks out--*and we find Jeff among them*! A spieler is standing in front near the driver, speaking through a small megaphone. SPIELER Yes, *sir*! You are looking at the building where your law-makers have sat since the time of Washington-- In the BUS, Jeff looks at the Spieler suddenly. JEFFERSON Since the time of Adams--not Washington. SPIELER How's that, buddy? JEFFERSON I said--I mean--Washington didn't live to see it finished. Congress didn't move here from Philadelphia till eighteen hundred. SPIELER (trying to scare him out of his facts) Oh--you're *sure* of that now? JEFFERSON Yes. Washington laid the cornerstone though--wearing an apron for the ceremony that was embroidered by Madame Lafayette-- SPIELER (interrupting) Yes, *sir*. (Quickly to driver) Let's *go* Henry. The driver throws the bus into gear as the spieler gives Jefferson a dirty look. SPIELER Now, on your right, folks--you see the Library of Congress-- All heads turn to look out of the right side of the bus, and the exterior of the CONGRESSIONAL LIBRARY is seen as the bus moves along. SPIELER'S VOICE --greatest library in the world. Five million books and two and a half-million maps, charts, and musical compositions-- In the BUS, JEFFERSON, seen closely, is looking at the building in an awed manner. JEFFERSON You left out the most important thing! That's where you see the Constitution and the Declaration of Independence! The SPIELER is seen getting pretty sore at this kind of thing. SPIELER As the gentleman says--without anybody asking him--that's where you see those original, priceless documents-- the Constitution and Declaration of Independence. (To Jeff, sarcastically) Much obliged, my friend. You're a great help to me. Let's *go*, Henry! The scene dissolves to a series of views (a TRAVEL MONTAGE) of the Washington monuments as Jeff sees them--his amazement and reverence on seeing the Supreme Court Building, the White House, the Washington Monuments, Constitution Avenue, and so on. Then the LINCOLN MEMORIAL comes to view and JEFF is seen walking up the steps--eyes fixed ahead wonderingly. Soon he approaches the top steps and now his is on the floor of the shrine. Suddenly he stops dead, and the full figure of LINCOLN comes to view--the huge, overpowering figure, seated in that great armchair. It is an almost breathing sculpture of the great, humane man, looking out. JEFFERSON, seen closely, is over-awed and reverent, looking up at the face. With mechanical steps he comes forward, against a background of enormous columns which shed a powerful solemnity upon the scene. He comes forward slowly and stops, and the words on the statue appear: IN THIS TEMPLE AS IN THE HEARTS OF THE PEOPLE FOR WHOM HE SAVED THE UNION THE MEMORY OF ABRAHAM LINCOLN IS ENSHRINED FOREVER JEFFERSON has his heart in his mouth. His head turns slowly to the left. On the LEFT WALL, the Second Inaugural Address of Lincoln, carved in the stone, appears, and JEFFERSON'S head turns back to Lincoln. He quotes in a half-voice--looking up as though he heard Lincoln say it: JEFFERSON (softly) '--with malice toward none, with charity for all--with firmness in the right as God gives us to see the right...' He breaks off and turns his head to the right. Then at the RIGHT WALL, the Gettysburg Address, carved in stone, appears, and JEFFERSON, turning back to the figure of Lincoln, again recites: JEFFERSON (softly) '--that these dead shall not have died in vain--that this nation, under God, shall--' LINCOLN'S FIGURE is seen at close range as Jefferson's voice comes over. JEFFERSON'S VOICE '--have a new birth of freedom--and that Government of the people, by the people, for the people--shall not perish from the earth...' While Jefferson says these words and while we hold on the face of the man who uttered them the scene dissolves slowly. JEFF'S SENATE OUTER OFFICE is seen at dusk; the light is murky. Saunders is pacing a groove in the carpet; Diz Moore is still reclining on the sofa. DIZ Getting on to dinner, isn't it, pal? SAUNDERS (grimly) I give that Trail Blazer five more minutes to show up-- (turning on the desk lamp viciously) --*five more minutes*! The phone rings. SAUNDERS (indicating the ringing phone) Well--who d'you take this time--Paine, Bill, Carl--or McGann? DIZ Hey--you're into me for a buck already. I say--McGann. Shoot the whole dollar. SAUNDERS Okay. For the dollar, I give you McGann *and* Bill and Carl. I got Paine. (Picking up the phone) Hello... Oh, yes. Saunders does a 'gimme' gesture at Diz. SAUNDERS No, not yet, Senator Paine--not hide nor hair of the man. You mean to say the boys haven't--? DIZ Eight to five Little Boy Blue is plastered. SAUNDERS (into the phone) Well, why don't they try the police-- get some blood hounds--or Indian guides-- In a CORNER OF THE PAINE HOTEL APARTMENT, Paine is on the telephone, and is smiling. PAINE As a last resort, maybe... Now wait, Saunders--you *can't* leave there! The one place he knows in this city-- is the Senate office--and you stay there and wait... it isn't *that* late-- In JEFF'S OUTER OFFICE: SAUNDERS (into the phone) All right--then another half hour. Just *one* half hour, Senator. Goodbye. She hangs up angrily and storms away. SAUNDERS Why don't I quit? Why don't I pick up and walk out of here? She passes Diz, grabbing the dollar bill which he holds up like a torch--and goes right on talking. SAUNDERS Tell me why! DIZ (looking at his empty hand) Well, because you're doing all right at the minute. SAUNDERS When Foley died, why didn't I clear out? How many times, did you hear me say I was fed up on politics and--? But *no*--I let 'em talk me into staying. Secretary to a leader of little squirts. Why? Because I need the job and a new suit of clothes. DIZ Would you settle for a husband? SAUNDERS (absently--walking) What's this, Diz? DIZ That old standing offer from Diz Moore--Poet of Washington Correspondents. SAUNDERS (absently) Huh? DIZ You know--Mrs. Diz Moore. She is walking furiously, her mind only half on what Diz is saying. SAUNDERS Oh--that again. Yeah. DIZ (flatly) I would cherish you--and stay sober. SAUNDERS Diz, you're a swell playmate--but--. Maybe if I saw you once with your hair combed, or something--or--no, no--I don't think even that would do it-- DIZ (resigned) Well, if you're sure it wouldn't--no use combing my hair for nothing. SAUNDERS No--don't do it. I'm sure. The truth is, Diz--there's no man I've seen yet or--must be something wrong with me. I've been feeling low for weeks. DIZ You got worms. SAUNDERS What! Who? DIZ You know--little worms--ambition. SAUNDERS Yeah. Should have seen me seven years ago--when I came to this town. *Now* what am I?--chambermaid to the Pied Piper of Jackson City; *Honorary* appointment! Scratch this thing an you'll find they wanted a dope here for two months. There is a knock on the door. SAUNDERS (yelling angrily) Yes! The door doesn't open at once. SAUNDERS Yes! The door opens slowly and Jefferson's head pokes in. SAUNDERS What is it? JEFFERSON Office of--Senator Smith? SAUNDERS *No*! JEFFERSON (looks at number on door) The man downstairs said number-- SAUNDERS No! Startled and scared, Jeff backs out, closing the door. SAUNDERS (to Diz, picking up where she left off) Yup--they must have picked the prize dummy-- (Then, struck by lightning--pointing at the door) *Wait* a minute! That wouldn't be-- *Daniel Boone*! She makes a beeline for the door, yanking it open. In the CORRIDOR, Jeff is gazing around at the door numbers bewilderedly--when Saunders appears. SAUNDERS (excitedly) What's your name? JEFFERSON J-Jefferson Smith. She makes a run and a grab for him. SAUNDERS Oh--oh! Come right in! Yes, indeed. Right this way-- She pulls him into the office, Jeff alarmed and speechless. In the OFFICE, Saunders is seen dragging him in, her movements very excited. SAUNDERS Now, hold it, Senator. Stay right where you are. Don't go 'way-- And she rushes for the phone. Diz' feet come off the sofa with a thud. SAUNDERS (into the phone, excitedly) Hello--hello. Helen! Get the Shoreham-- Paine's apartment. Hurry, will you! She holds the phone. JEFFERSON Is--is something the matter? SAUNDERS Oh, no--no! (Then with heavy sarcasm) My dear *Senator*--it may be customary out on the prairie to take French leave of people and not be heard of again for five hours-- JEFFERSON Gee--I'm sorry about that, Miss--you *are* Miss Saunders, aren't you? SAUNDERS Yes, I'm Saunders--and this is Mr. Moore--a member of the press. Meet the *Senator*, Mr. Moore. JEFFERSON (seizing Diz' hand) Pleased to meet you, sir. DIZ (wincing under the handshake) How do you do, Senator? I see you made it. JEFFERSON Made it? Oh! Yes. Silly of me--you see, what happened was-- SAUNDERS (suddenly into the phone, with heavy sarcasm) Hello... Yes, Senator Paine. Yes. Right here. Just came in--under his own power... Yes--he's sober--that's the very next thing on the schedule... Yes, sir, I'll have him right over. She hangs up, and comes forward to Jefferson. JEFFERSON Gee, I'm sorry. You see, it wasn't until I was fairly well along in the bus that I realized-- SAUNDERS Did you say--bus? JEFFERSON One of those sightseers--you know. You see, I--gosh, I've never been called absent-minded or... but there it was all of a sudden--looking right at me through one of the station doors-- SAUNDERS There *what* was? JEFFERSON The Dome--the Capitol Dome-- Saunders just looks at Diz with wide eyes. JEFFERSON --big as life--sparkling away there under the sun. I--I started walking toward it--and there was a bus outside-- and--well--I--I just naturally got aboard-- SAUNDERS Most natural thing in the world! JEFFERSON I don't believe I've been so thrilled in my--oh, and that Lincoln Memorial! Gee! There he is--Mr. Lincoln--looking right at you as you come up the steps-- sitting there like he was waiting for someone to come along-- SAUNDERS Well--he's got nothing on me. She turns away and starts for her hat and coat. SAUNDERS Now, if you're ready, Senator, we can start for the hotel. I'll *see* that you get there. JEFFERSON (with a laugh) Yes--I think maybe you'd better. The scene dissolves to the interior of the TAXICAB with JEFFERSON AND SAUNDERS, Jefferson looking out of the windows, seeing what he can see, even though it's night; Saunders giving him an impatient, martyred look. JEFFERSON (pointing out) Whose statue is that? SAUNDERS I wouldn't know in the *day time*. Suddenly he leans over Saunders and points excitedly out her side of the cab. JEFFERSON The Capitol Dome! Lighted up! SAUNDERS (gently pushing him off) You--uh--you better relax, Senator. You'll be plumb wore out. JEFFERSON Tell me, Miss Saunders--what time does the Senate--uh--what do they call it? SAUNDERS Convene? JEFFERSON Convene--that's it--yes. I got to pick up some of those parliamentary words. I imagine a fellow can get pretty lost in the Senate without 'em-- SAUNDERS (more or less under her breath) With or without 'em. (Quickly) Twelve--noon. The Senate convenes at twelve o'clock. JEFFERSON (breaking in--full of the idea) Gosh--that'll be something! You know what I better do in the morning? SAUNDERS (wearily) No. What had you better--? JEFFERSON Go out to Mount Vernon. It'd be a sort of fine thing to do--see Washington's home just before walking into the Senate for the first time-- don't you think? SAUNDERS (hollowly) Oh--a wonderful thing--yes. Get you right in the mood--yes--yes. Just then, the cab pulls over toward the curb and Saunders perks up. SAUNDERS Oh--and *here* we are, Senator! Well, well, well! At last! The cab stops and a uniformed doorman opens the cab door on Jefferson's side. Now we see the HOTEL CURB, THE CAB, THE FOOTMAN, and JEFF looking out of the cab. Coming out of the hotel is a party in evening dress--white mufflered, top-hatted man--and women in furs. SAUNDERS (impatiently) After you. Do you mind? Jeff stares at the party, at the footman--then up at the fifteen-story hotel. SAUNDERS (very impatiently) This is *it*, Senator! In the CAB: JEFFERSON No, gee--I couldn't stay here-- SAUNDERS (amazed) You *couldn't*? JEFFERSON I mean--gosh--I wouldn't be comfortable in a--I--I haven't got clothes and things like that--and--I couldn't keep pigeons *there*--No--I-- I just--just wouldn't be-- And he pulls the cab door closed. DRIVER Where to, Mister? JEFFERSON Where to, Miss Saunders? SAUNDERS (at the end of her patience) Where? Why, the wide open spaces! The scene dissolves to a PHONE BOOTH, with SAUNDERS telephoning. SAUNDERS (with emphasis) --all I know is, he refused to go into your hotel, Senator Paine--and not having my lasso with me, I didn't know how to *make* him. In PAINE'S HOTEL APARTMENT, Paine is on the phone, with McGann in the background. PAINE What did you do? Where did he go? In the PHONE BOOTH: SAUNDERS Well--finally--after a substantial tour of the city, he saw a sort of boarding house, built nice and close to the ground. That's what he wanted-- and that's where you're to send his bags--Eleven B Street, Northeast. Oh-- and don't forget the pigeons! In PAINE'S HOTEL APARTMENT: PAINE And that's where you *left* him? In the PHONE BOOTH: SAUNDERS (with weary sarcasm) ...Oh, he's perfectly all right. Going to stay in and write to Ma tonight... Ma. Ma. Don't you know Ma? And then he'll take his swig of Castoria and go to sleep... I'd rather not think about the morning right now, if you don't mind. Goodnight, Senator! (She hangs up) In PAINE'S HOTEL APARTMENT, Paine hangs up the phone. PAINE Eleven B Street, Northeast. Take his bags and your own right over--and get yourself a room in the same place-- MCGANN Listen, Joe--at least--after a day like this--I got one good bust coming before I start showing him monuments-- He is interrupted by Susan, who comes dashing in excitedly, all dressed to go out. SUSAN For heaven's sake--will someone please get those pigeons out of this apartment! They're smelling up the place something-- MCGANN Pigeons! The scene dissolves to a RESTAURANT BAR, with Saunders and Diz hopped up on stools. Saunders is grimly and angrily holding forth. SAUNDERS I'm still asking myself--what is he-- animal, vegetable, or mineral? A Senator! A United States Senator! I thought I'd seen everything but-- why, he doesn't know what time it is, Diz! When I think of myself sitting around--playing straight for all that phoney, patriotic chatter-- *me*, carrying bibs for an infant with little flags in his fists--no, I can't take it, Diz--I'm through--I quit! DIZ Sure--sure--wait a minute now--simmer down-- NOSEY, at this point, saunters up to the bar, his back to Saunders. SAUNDERS (breaking out again) Why--do you know what he's going to do before taking that Senate seat tomorrow? He's going to Mount Vernon-- to get into the mood--a *warm up*! Nosey swings around in a flash and pushes his face right in. NOSEY Who? Who? Your boss! A nut, huh? A nut! Wow! There's a *story* in this guy--! I smelled it! SAUNDERS (impatient) Go away, Nosey. NOSEY Saunders--it's meat and drink--lemme at 'im! Five minutes--! I'll make it right with you! DIZ Will you go chase an ambulance! SAUNDERS Whadaya mean--*right*? NOSEY What do I *mean*, huh? Uh--*I'll* tell ya--World's Series--a pass! In a month it's worth fifteen bucks! SAUNDERS Well, well! DIZ (to Saunders) Hey--you're not *talking* to this guy! NOSEY Whadaya say? DIZ Nothin'! Beat it! SAUNDERS Look, Nosey--your pals would like to get in on this, wouldn't they? NOSEY Hey--I wanna *scoop*! SAUNDERS Well, that's out. Either it's *lots* of reporters and *lots* of tickets or--. Now will you go and call 'em before I change my mind about the whole thing! NOSEY Okay. See you here. He charges off. Saunders clambers down off the stool. Diz grabs her arm. DIZ Kid--wait--what do you think you're going to do? SAUNDERS Get my *whole* fall outfit--and quit this job in style! DIZ Now, you've got more sense than to put Nosey onto this guy--! SAUNDERS (thinking hard) Wait--wait. Let's see--watchdog McGann-- he's bound to move right in--get him out of the way first-- (Then) Pardon me, friend--I've got some telephoning to do--! (And she rushes off) The scene dissolves to a PHONE BOOTH, with SAUNDERS on the phone. SAUNDERS (laying on a Southern accent) Mr. McGann?... This is Miss Lulu Love. In MCGANN'S ROOM, MCGANN is on the phone; behind him, his suitcases are open. MCGANN Who? In the PHONE BOOTH: SAUNDERS Oh, you don't know *me*, Mr. McGann-- but I've seen *you* in Washington before--and I think you're awfully cute. Mr. Griffith told me you got in and maybe you were a little lonely-- In MCGANN'S ROOM: MCGANN (taking it big) Did, huh? Well, now, he's not wrong at all... Tonight? Sister, that's just what the doctor ordered... Whoa, wait a minute-- He looks off, and through a partly opened door leading into Jeff's room. Jeff appears standing at the window with one of his pigeons, while McGann is heard on the phone. MCGANN'S VOICE I'm not sure I can make that, Lulu. Hold on a second, will you? (He puts his hand over the mouthpiece, and calls out) Say--Senator! How're you fixed--I mean--uh--you're gonna stay in and write to Ma and the boys, like you said, huh? In JEFF'S ROOM, JEFF is inserting a small roll of paper in a little metal container on the pigeon's leg. JEFFERSON (without turning) Uh-huh. MCGANN'S VOICE Not going out or anything? JEFFERSON No. Why? In MCGANN'S ROOM: MCGANN (yelling to Jeff) Atta boy. Right into bed for a nice long sleep. Me, too. (Then--softly, into phone) Okay, Toots! When and where? In the PHONE BOOTH, Saunders is still speaking. SAUNDERS (into the phone) Now isn't that nice! Let's say the Mayflower lobby, Mr. McGann--in a half hour... What I *look* like? Well, I got red hair and--oh, that's all right--I know what *you* look like--you cute thing. Goodbye. (She hangs up) In MCGANN'S ROOM, McGann hangs up, tiptoes over quickly and closes the door to Jeff's room, then makes a dash for his coat. MCGANN Boy, oh, boy! Red Hair! McGann--you fell into something! The scene dissolves to the HOTEL LOBBY at night, and MCGANN is seen watching for his date, but in JEFFERSON'S BOARDING HOUSE SITTING ROOM there is a startling tableau: Jeff is standing in the center of this rather homely, anciently appointed sitting room, surrounded by ten or a dozen newspaper men, three or four of whom have cameras. A woman reporter is present. Nosey is leading the circus as the main interrogator and master of ceremonies. Cameras are flashing, while Jefferson is posing, pleased and happy and proud. VOICES That's it. Right like that. Chin up a little, Senator--please. Hold it! Then the cameras relax and questions pop. VOICES Tell us about yourself, Senator! Hear you got a Boy's Club back home! Any ideas? Going to make things hum in the Senate, huh? JEFFERSON (holding his hands up, laughing) Hold on, fellows--I'm not used to more then one question at a time-- NOSEY One moment, friends, let's give the Senator a break. (To Jeff) Now, where'd you say you studied law? JEFFERSON Well--I haven't needed much law so far--what I'd like to get first is a little common sense-- NOSEY Swell! REPORTER What did he say? NOSEY (calling back) You don't need law--you need *common* sense! Reporters make rapid notes. REPORTER What are you going to do while you're here, Senator? NOSEY Any special ax to grind? JEFFERSON Ax? NOSEY A pet idea--you know--pension bill-- save the buffalo--you've got *one* notion you think would be good for this country, haven't you? JEFFERSON Well--I have got *one* idea-- VOICES Ah! That's more like it! What? JEFFERSON Well--for a couple of years now--I-- I've thought it would be a wonderful thing to have a National Boys' Camp out in our State-- VOICES A camp! Well! JEFFERSON You see--if we could take the poor kids off the streets--out of cities-- a few months in the summer--learn something about Nature and American ideals-- NOSEY Marvelous! And what would this camp set the Government back? JEFFERSON Oh--nothing--nothing. My idea is-- for the Government to lend us the money--and the boys'll pay it back-- sending in a penny or a nickel--no more than a dime--no, gosh--the Government's got enough on its hands without-- NOSEY Great! (Calls back) The Government's putting dough in too many places *now*! VOICES (as they make notes) You don't say! Well, well! WOMAN REPORTER What do you think of the girls in our town, Senator? JEFFERSON Well--I haven't seen many--oh--well-- Miss Susan Paine--she's about the prettiest girl I--I *ever* saw-- REPORTER How about some more pictures, Senator? NOSEY Yeah! How about it? You're a nature lover. Do you handle any of that sign language? JEFFERSON Well--I can *manage*-- ANOTHER REPORTER What about bird calls! Know any? JEFFERSON Well--a few-- VOICES Swell! Well! Come right ahead! Let 'em fly, Senator! As Jeff laughs, preparing to do his stuff--and as the cameras are made ready-- The scene dissolves to the HOTEL LOBBY. McGann, looking at his watch, is sore as a boil by this time. Glaring off, his attention is arrested. He starts forward. At the SWINGING DOOR, a cute little girl has just come through and stands. McGann marches up to her. MCGANN Well! About time, toots! Redhead or no readhead--keeping a guy waiting two hours is no-- (Looking her over, relaxing, and grabbing her arm) Good thing you're as cute as you are, or I'd-- THE GIRL (struggling) Wally! A big six-footer, with football shoulders, comes swinging in. The girl leaps to his side. McGann at once realizes a hideous mistake has been made somewhere--and it's too late. Wally fixes him with a deadly stare and advances to do murder. McGann starts backing away in alarm as the scene dissolves amid a dash of music. A NEWSPAPER FRONT PAGE come to view. It reveals a full-length picture of Jeff, and then the caption: SENATOR (RANGER) SMITH Demands More Common Sense-- Less Law In Government This dissolves to ANOTHER HEADLINE: SMITH ATTACKS GOVERNMENT SPENDING No Money Left for Boy's Camp In SAUNDER'S ROOM, Saunders is drinking her morning coffee-- looking at the morning papers. She nearly chokes as she stares at the paper. This scene dissolves to MCGANN'S ROOM, with McGann, half- dressed, one eye bandaged, staring at a paper. A NEWS PICTURE comes to view, showing Jeff kneeling over a little fire of sticks. The caption reads: MAKES CAMP FIRE--SHOWS HOW HE'LL PUT THE HEAT ON CONGRESS MCGANN, shirt-tails flying, tears for the door to Jeff's room. It is empty. MCGANN Senator! Hey--ranger! (Clapping a hand to his forehead) Gone again! The scene dissolves to a NEWSPAPER PICTURE of Jefferson imitating a bird-call eyes bulging--while his two hands appear to be gripping his nose as if warding off a bad odor. The caption reads: RANGER SENATOR GETS FIRST "WHIFF" OF OFFICIAL WASHINGTON In the DINING ROOM OF PAINE'S HOTEL APARTMENT, Paine and Susan are at breakfast, Paine's eyes glued wildly to the paper; Susan also holds a paper and laughs. PAINE His first 'whiff'! SUSAN Such pretty knees for a big boy! PAINE Do I actually *see* this--? SUSAN Listen, Father! "Young Lochinvar smitten with Susan Paine"! The scene dissolves to PAINE'S PRIVATE OFFICE as Saunders enters and Paine rises from behind his desk. SAUNDERS (belligerently) You want to see me, Senator? PAINE Yes. Good morning, Saunders. (Picking up the newspaper; genially) Have you--uh--any idea how this happened? SAUNDERS The ranger's notices? No idea at all. PAINE (with good humor) No? SAUNDERS No--I'm sorry. I merely saw him home. I'm not supposed to tuck him in and give him his bottle. That's McGann's job. PAINE By the way, Mr. McGann just phoned-- in a high fever. Smith's gone again. Have you any idea where? SAUNDERS Yes. He went to Mount Vernon to give himself a patriotic address. PAINE (smiling) Well--that's very fine. (Then) Saunders, some person in your office says you've quit-- SAUNDERS That's right. PAINE Oh, now--that won't do-- SAUNDERS Look, Senator--I wasn't given a brain just to tell a Boy Ranger what time it is. What do you